Why! Am I useless?
by Hkari Ai
Summary: Shio was gone after she saved humankind from Nova... Some thoughts of the 1st unit leader about Shio FemMc Summary: Soma's depressed because he lost Shio. Hikari's depressed cause there's nothing she can do but watch from a distance, after all she's just the leader. Mostly Oc X Shio, slight Oc X Soma [ADDED: FRAGILE PLEA]
1. Chapter 1

Hikari: Hello, boys and girls! Here I am again, your beloved crappy author! XD

Ok. Sooo before you people continue to the story I just want to say one thing "Im VERY VERY DISAPPOINTED!" Why does GEB have few FFs? GEB is an ass-kickin' game! :

[WARNING: This story contains a bitter-sweet truth about OC X Soma fans.. im also very teary when i was writing this..This hurt soo much! So, yeah] Oh yeah! ONCE AGAIN SPECIALTHANKS TO Manaxsavior

Disclaimer: I do not own GEB if I did, I should put more clothes for crafting and some of those clothes are Lolita outfits and for other cosplay needs XD

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**_Why? Am I useless_**_**?**_

It's been only a 3 days since the 1st unit lost Shio and saved humankind. Kota was doing his best not to fall into depression as the others did. Alisa sometimes locks herself in her room but tried her best to smile. Sakuya she still mourned over Lindow but tried her best to comfort Alisa. Then there's Soma: the person that was most attached to her. He still locked himself in his room. They hardly ever see him. The same thing applied to their Leader. They would hear sobbing coming from her room on nights where The Den fell quiet enough to hear. Why was she depressed? Shouldn't she be happy that her rival was gone? No..that wasn't the case.

Hikari, she already gave up on her love...

_FLASHBACK_

[Shio and Hikari were the only ones left, the other were requested on a mission and Dr. Sakaki went out to get some cores]

"Ne, Shio do love Soma?" Hikari sat next to Shio on her bed.

"Love?" Shio titled her head a little

Hikari giggled "You see, Love is when you have someone really REALLY important, and you can't live without them!"

"Ohhh" Shio though for a moment replied with a grin on her face "Yesh! Shio loves Soma!"

Hikari giggled once more and stared at the drawings on the wall. She avoided eye contact with the aragami girl as much as possible. "Ne, Shio, you know that I love Soma too, right?" Hikari glanced over in Shio's direction.

"..." no answer Shio just stared at her, Hikari ruffled Shio's hair and said "No worries I'm not a rival!"

Shio looked at her with curious eyes "A...ri...val?" Hikari smiled at her "Ne, Shio do you think I should give up on Love?" Her expression was mixed with pain; even so she tried to smile.

"No, you can't give..up on Love! Leader will die!" Shio looked at her with pleading eyes, Hikari's eyes was still focused on the drawings

"Ne, Shio do you want Leader to live?" Hikari finally looked at her with eyes full tenderness; Shio nodded her head almost instantly "Then make me a promise..." She said

"A promise?" Shio nodded hesitantly

Hiker looked at her eyes "Promise me that you'll never make Soma lonely, that you'll never leave his side.." tears treated to fall, she quickly wiped away the tears with her sleeve.

Shio tightly held her hand "Shio promises, Leader!"

Hikari smiled _'They would make a good couple_' she laughed inwardly at her own bitterness.

"Let's go and see if there's food already, Ne?" Hikari made her way through the door and stretched her hand towards Shio, Shio smiled "Yay, Food! I'm ready to eat!"

_End of flashback_

She laughed at herself, It was close to impossible for Shio to stay forever. She knew that. Shio may have broken her promise, but she didn't forget hers. She kept her word she will never be her rival.

Hikari rose from her bed and made her way through the door. Looking at Soma's door, she let out a sad smile.

Shio maybe gone but not forgotten, pressing the elevator button that would lead her to the entrance, Hikari breathed deeply and placed her usual poker face mask, knowing that there's nothing she could do but to stay strong, after all...

She's just the leader, nothing more...

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Soo how u like it!

Don't for-get to R & R! :D

Oh and also forget about grammar errors...Im doing my very best to get a Beta-reader... (-_-")

Because... I don't want to trouble anyone..BUT still** Mana~chan is the best English and Fanfic sensei** that i ever had! :D

I you review..ill recommend you a nice 4 one-shot manga : (just PM me XD ... im serious. )

(-_-) This is how serious Iam about that manga..


	2. Fragile Plea

**AI: **YO! MINNA~ 3 HEHEHEHE...My feels again (TT^TT)...I know i should be doing homework right now but i really wanted to upload this! Mana~chan said that this would be ok. I cried during this scene..well, its much like a continuation of **"Why? Am i useless?"**...Im pretty much stalling and posting short stories with my feels...Oh well!

Note: This continues from the FRAGILE PLEA SCENE TO THE PROLOGUE TO GOODBYE..

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOW OWN GEB. IF I DID ID TOTALLY PUT MORE FASHIONS AND MORE DIALOGS FOR THE PROTAGONIST XD .**

**Please do not mind the wrong grammars, punctuations and spelling... (^_^')**

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**[Fragile Plea Scene]**

"No way...No way I'm gonna hand Shio to that bastard!"

_'I know, that you don't want that to happen'  
_

"Don't get me wrong. I don't like the way he manipulates me and Shio as if were his goddamn toys, that's all" He shifted his buster blade

_'Ahahaha no need to explain Soma...I already know' _Hikari felt a pain in her chest...nothing physical...But it hurts so much. Soma's lips turned into a small smile.

"Come to think of it...I jabbed you with my sword the first time we met, too" He withdrew his blade "You were just a rookie then...and now you're a leader" after that Soma gave her a warning about the aragamis "Don't let your guard down"

Hikari still kept her poker face not even listening what was Soma's saying. Hikari looked at the sunset with Soma deep in thought _'I'll make sure that no one comes between their happiness..._' glancing at Soma's direction she held her gaze firmly _'Not even...Me'._

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**[Prologue to good bye]**

"what is this I wonder, I don't like this one!" Shio wiped her tears with her arm

" it's because it's a song of parting, that's why..." Soma suddenly answered her

"A song of parting..."

"'I'll never see my loved one again' that's what the word say..."

" but we did meet again..." She smiled warmly

"Geez... That's because I came looking for you..." Soma then smiled, a light pink tinted his cheeks" Let's go home Shio"

"Ok" Shio replied almost instantly

they didn't notice the leader, clutching the cloth over her heart. Feeling much more pain...but she swore...she swore that she won't come between them, she clutched the fabric in her hand tighter. Refusing the tears that she has been holding back to fall...but during that moment she didn't care anymore she slowly backed away from the talking couple, turned her back at them. She let her tears fall for the first time she became a gods eater because she knew that this pain was more painful that being wounded by an aragami.

"Urrggg!" Shio's abnormality started again. Hikari quickly wiped her tears and walked slowly to Soma who hasn't notice her absence.

"Shio, Is it happening again?!" Soma shouted, half-asked.

Her eyes widen, glancing at Soma, Hikari wanted to shout but only to choke.

"I got to go..." _'No Shio! You promised me!' _Hikari wanting to say these words to stop her but afraid that it might ruin their romantic moment

"Hey come back here! Shio!" Hikari furrowed her brow at this...there's no time standing around and shouting, wasting no time she went to the pile of rocks and aragami. Shio fainted at the edge

"I don't get what's happening but were heading back to the Den!" Soma commanded, finally glancing at his side. The leader wasn't at his anymore but instead climbing the rocks to get to Shio...

"If you really love her then, don't just stand around!" that's what her eyes shouted...

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**[Back to the Den]**

Soma was carrying Shio, the leader was walking beside him with her hands marked with a few scratches and wounds. The fist unit immediately ran over to them. The leader used this moment to escape and ran to the elevator.

Sakuya and Alisa gave a small nod to each other. The former left to follow their leader.

Sakuya had found the leader quietly sobbing at the halls of the veterans section. She invited her to go inside of her room, which she gladly accepted.

**(Inside the room...)**

Hikari's eyes only stared at the coffee in front of her, looking at her own reflection, on the verge of breaking down in tears. Sakuya sighed and place her hand over Hikari's, slowly putting the cup down.

"I know that things has been hard...especially when the pain was right in front of your eyes" she spoke with utmost tenderness " It's ok you can cry in front of me..I won't think you're weak"

Hikari's eyes glistened with the tears that she held back but with those words said, She smiled at Sakuya with a pained expression "Ahahaha, No its ok I'm perfectly fine" Hikari slowly felt warm drops of liquid fell down to her lap, she faked laughing once more "Ahahaha i said im...perfectly fine..." Giving Sakuya the same expression but Her tears only fell faster...She just can't cry in front of her comrades... a leader should never be weak and they should also never...fall in love with one of her subordinates. Sakuya brought her to a warm hug before asking "Why do need to be strong all time" Hikari only answered "I need to be...I need to be strong so I won't hurt myself" Her tears wetting Sakuya's shoulder hugging her tightly "You don't have to be strong in front of me, because I know that you are" giving her a warm smile. Hikari's stubbornness melted putting her defences down knowing that it's Sakuya who experience much more tragedy than she did...knowing that Sakuya understands.

.

Hikari finally calmed down. Checking her appearance once again, seeing her puffy eyes are gone, she sighed happy with the results. Hikari twirled around and faced Sakuya

"Thank you so much, Sakuya. I'd love to stay and chat but I have my duties too" Giving Sakuya all the cheerfulness she had left and forming it into a smile.

"No problem!" Sakuya giggled, her expression changed from smiling to a warm and compassionate facial expression " But remember if you ever need someone to talk to you can talk to me, ok?"

Hikari nodded with a small smile plastered in her face, taking a deep breath. She slowly made her way to Dr. Sakaki's lab...

**[End]**

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**REVIEW PLEASE! IF YOU *POINTS* YES IM POINTING AT YOU! DON'T DO THAT FACE!  
PLEASE NO FLAMES! I ONLY DO GEB FF, UNLESS I FINISH THE [PROJECT] XD  
PLEASE LOOK FORWARD TO THAT TOO!**

I KNOW MY FEEL (TT^TT) I JUST WANTED TO POST SOMETHING...

**AI: **Hi! Mana~chan!


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